Tuesday, 2 September 2014

Life without the internet!

Yesterday morning I read and actioned my emails.

Yesterday afternoon I couldn't read or action my emails!

A quick call to the service provider was all I thought I needed. Quick. There is no such word as quick when it comes to computers and the internet. My modem wasn't behaving as it should. "Is the light on the back flashing?" "No". "Is the light on the front flashing". No. "Can you plug it into a different power point". I'm on the floor trying to find where it is plugged in. Finally I find it. Then I have to crawl out of that hole and drag the modem and the connections as far across the room as possible taking care not to garotte myself on the cords as I go. We repeated the process so many times that I thought I would expire!No need for the gym today!

And the result of over an hour of fiddling, pushing buttons, looking at lights on the front and back of the modem (at the same time?!?!), crawling under the desk, and the final result - still no signal. Ah ha the modem needs replacing. "We will fast track this for you and you should receive it in 3-5 days". 3-5 days? Now if that is fast tracking I hate to think what slow tracking is? 

And then I had a bright idea. While I was waiting for the new fast-track modem to arrive 'express at my door' I would bring the modem I have at another property nearby back to my home. After all it was only WIFI broadband that I wanted. I was thrilled with myself for thinking outside the square. 

So this morning I collected the 'other' modem and plugged it in at home. Da Da. Up came the notice that it was connected but wouldn't connect. So this was the connection that was and yet wasn't!!!! How could that be! So back on the phone to the service department. Just explaining that I had a fast track replacement modem enroute to my home to replace the failed one (yesterday) and that I was now using another modem from my other property was complicated enought but 5 - I repeat 5 hours - and many phone calls - later (the technician had to go to the loo, lunch, discuss my 'case' with I don't know who) I was finally up and running. I must say that Rob the unlucky technician who took my call couldn't have been more pleasant as I struggled with yellow cords, crawling round the floor, resetting the modem; "use the point of a bent paper clip and hold in for 30 seconds" he said - well just finding a paperclip was an exercise in itself; then when that didn't work he suggested trying it all over again on a second computer (more cords and more floor crawling) until we were finally up and running! I could go on but I think you have the picture - and talking of pictures - here it is! 
2 computers, 2 mice(!), numerous cords above and below the desk, the rear of the modem, 2 powerpoints and a great big mess
I dread to think what it will be like explaining to the service department that the new fast-track modem that is on its way to me as I type is now being installed at the 'other' property - whilst I keep the 'other' property modem at my home!!!!!!!!!!!!! 
Even my wise old owls had trouble! But look - I'm up and running - 3 green lights - whoo hoo we hooted
Ain't technology grand (when it works)

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